Dealing with Failure

“F”

The bold letter from your recently written math test stares back at you. You rub your eyes in hopes of seeing something different, but nothing changes. This can’t be happening; you get perfect grades and straight A’s. Still, in disbelief- you get the courage to flip through the test. As you go over it, you realize that you made MANY mistakes. The shock fills you as tears start to prick your eyes. You begin to panic and worry. Your brain starts going twice as fast, your hands are trembling, and thoughts are racing. “What will my parents think; my average will drop; what if I can never do better?”

STOP

Take a deep breath and relax; inhale, and exhale. I know this feels like the end of the world, I've been there before, but you need to know that an F isn’t the worst thing to happen. Failing a test is quite a shock, especially if you are a hard-working student who ALWAYS gets good grades. But it is crucial to understand that failing doesn’t make you stupid or dumb. In the following steps, I will show you how to recover from failure.

1. Accept

This is the hardest step, accepting that you did fail a test. Don't worry, though it's okay! There can be a billion reasons as to why you didn’t do well on this test, and none of them are your fault. Your parents could be disappointed, but this is YOUR future, not theirs. Prioritize yourself, and trust yourself to know that you will get through this and do better next time. Remember that a singular test does not change your future. You are capable enough to do better and work towards better things. Accept your mistake, and work on not repeating it again. Failing means something isn’t right. There could be many reasons, such as your studying method, your teacher, or your way of handling stress. It's an indication that you need to change something, NOT that you are academically declined. This leads us to the next step, finding out why this happened.

2. Find out Why

So why did this happen? It is very important to uncover the cause because it needs to be changed. There’s a chance you may have understood your work wrong. Maybe you’ve been extremely busy and didn’t get time to study thoroughly, or maybe you were just extremely stressed. Those are all valid reasons! Never blame yourself, that's the worst thing you can do. It can also be your studying methods. As a freshman in highschool I’ve learned that everyone has a different studying method that works for them. Some people prefer handwritten notes while others prefer to simply read. It's okay if you don’t know what's wrong, try experimenting and changing your habits and find out.

3. Time to Improve

I know that even looking at this test haunts you, but the only way to improve is to go over it and see where you made mistakes. Is there a pattern? If there is, maybe you didn’t pay enough attention to these questions. It could be the way you study. I love to make cue cards as I can summarize notes and write major points. If that doesn't work, there are many more studying methods! I have friends who prefer reading and highlighting crucial phrases, and some that prefer doing practice questions. Experiment and see what works for you. That is the point of the first few years of your school life! It could even be non-academic related. As we get older our lives get a lot more complicated and school sometimes makes it much harder. It's important to have things that can make you happy and help you manage stress. For me; this includes music, talking to my friends, or venting about my problems. Taking care of yourself is extremely important as you should always prioritize yourself. You really are your own best friend. Whatever you believe the reason you failed is, work towards changing it and don’t give up. Keep going until you find what works.

Hopefully, after following these steps, you’ve gotten clarity on how failure isn’t a bad thing. You are so much more than a grade on a piece of paper, so never let that take hold of you. Give yourself time and work towards improvement. As Confucius said, “Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but rising every time we fall”. So never be afraid of failing as it's all a part of life, and never ever give up.

Edited by Jamie Zhang

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Hey! My name is Rishika and I’m a grade 9 student part of the IB programme. As a freshman in highschool there were so many new experiences and things to learn! Something I struggled with the most was low grades, but I was able to overcome it, and now I’m here to share how you can too!